Need to get my shit straight....
Well, it looks like I might take a few weeks off of playing this silly game of poker. I went to Pops last night after my daughters 3rd birthday party, ending up coming late, and bought in kinda short for a 1/2 NL game. I sat down with almost all regulars, people that know when Im playing scared, and Ive been playing scared for 3 weeks now. Im under a little financial stress, not shit I should really be complaining about, but I havent had to worry about paying bills in a long time, and some past shit has finally come back to bite a few the asses of a me and the people I live with, and its going to cause me problems for the next month, and possibly longer, really leaving me with very little money to gamble with. And I think its showed for a little while now.
I didnt get a whole lot of playing hands, and I didnt have position in alot of the halfway decent hands I did have, and it just seemed that the two powerhouses at the end of the table, Trav and Wes, were pretty much controlling the table, with good reason. Needless to say, I lost all the money I came in with, and got on the board with a loan from Trav for 100 bucks, I end up doubling that at some point, but get back to just slowly pissing it away, not making any moves, hesitating too much and showing some serious weakness, it was just sickening to me, and everyone else I suppose. I even got into a verbal altercation with Kevin at one point, because he essentially warned me that I was making it easy for him to push me around, even though the hand we did get involved in, I had top pair with an OK kicker, and he most likely flopped a set. Thats when the verbal assault started, I got the last word in, but it doesnt mean my pride didnt get hurt, I really wish I could get physical at these games without worrying about not getting invited back, but Im a family man now, gotta move on from the high school, beat up the asshole with the mouth days. I just heard a little too much animosity in his voice, and it made what he said very insulting, and that just popped my anger cap off, making me very hostile. Kevin, if you read this, I apologize for yelling at you, E said you were just letting me know Im playing like crap, and I shouldnt have popped off at you like I did.
I dont know, I think Im going to take a little time off, maybe only play when I really have money to work with, and just rethink my position in poker, because when I get myself in with the big boys, I let myself get intimidated too much, and I was slowly moving away from that, only to have life throw a few curveballs, and throw my shit off track, and going right back to playing scared, please take my money, poker.
What I really want, is to go back to the days where E's game was the shit, where you had so many new faces that it was pathetic how much money these people would actually lose. Sure, I saw a few guys get lucky from time to time catching cards and draws against the regulars, I was one of them at one point, but right there, at that time before the robbery, where I was coming into my own, and becoming part of the herd, waiting for new blood to come in and get tapped, it got shit on, but some pathetic motherfuckers who dont know what real hard work is. And ever since, we havent been able to have a regular game. I would go to bigslicksters game, because from what I hear he has mega-fish rolling through his spot, and that makes me wanna go real bad, but Im a loyalist, I like E too much to fake on his game, I just wish his shit was back to normal, but who knows if that will ever happen. I know a few of us who are very loyal to E, and I think were all just kinda waiting until we can find a nice spot, and get back into the groove of things, fuck it man, cant get scared forever, right? I mean, overall, it seems that those robberies at Berts place, E's, those ones in Virginia, and the cops raiding shit all over the place, its hard to find good home games, with lots of tools coming to give you their money. Im slowly learning of some cash games down this way at some of the local lodges, and I wanna run a game myself, but no one wants to drive to southern maryland, so Im kinda out here by myself.
I didnt get a whole lot of playing hands, and I didnt have position in alot of the halfway decent hands I did have, and it just seemed that the two powerhouses at the end of the table, Trav and Wes, were pretty much controlling the table, with good reason. Needless to say, I lost all the money I came in with, and got on the board with a loan from Trav for 100 bucks, I end up doubling that at some point, but get back to just slowly pissing it away, not making any moves, hesitating too much and showing some serious weakness, it was just sickening to me, and everyone else I suppose. I even got into a verbal altercation with Kevin at one point, because he essentially warned me that I was making it easy for him to push me around, even though the hand we did get involved in, I had top pair with an OK kicker, and he most likely flopped a set. Thats when the verbal assault started, I got the last word in, but it doesnt mean my pride didnt get hurt, I really wish I could get physical at these games without worrying about not getting invited back, but Im a family man now, gotta move on from the high school, beat up the asshole with the mouth days. I just heard a little too much animosity in his voice, and it made what he said very insulting, and that just popped my anger cap off, making me very hostile. Kevin, if you read this, I apologize for yelling at you, E said you were just letting me know Im playing like crap, and I shouldnt have popped off at you like I did.
I dont know, I think Im going to take a little time off, maybe only play when I really have money to work with, and just rethink my position in poker, because when I get myself in with the big boys, I let myself get intimidated too much, and I was slowly moving away from that, only to have life throw a few curveballs, and throw my shit off track, and going right back to playing scared, please take my money, poker.
What I really want, is to go back to the days where E's game was the shit, where you had so many new faces that it was pathetic how much money these people would actually lose. Sure, I saw a few guys get lucky from time to time catching cards and draws against the regulars, I was one of them at one point, but right there, at that time before the robbery, where I was coming into my own, and becoming part of the herd, waiting for new blood to come in and get tapped, it got shit on, but some pathetic motherfuckers who dont know what real hard work is. And ever since, we havent been able to have a regular game. I would go to bigslicksters game, because from what I hear he has mega-fish rolling through his spot, and that makes me wanna go real bad, but Im a loyalist, I like E too much to fake on his game, I just wish his shit was back to normal, but who knows if that will ever happen. I know a few of us who are very loyal to E, and I think were all just kinda waiting until we can find a nice spot, and get back into the groove of things, fuck it man, cant get scared forever, right? I mean, overall, it seems that those robberies at Berts place, E's, those ones in Virginia, and the cops raiding shit all over the place, its hard to find good home games, with lots of tools coming to give you their money. Im slowly learning of some cash games down this way at some of the local lodges, and I wanna run a game myself, but no one wants to drive to southern maryland, so Im kinda out here by myself.
posted by SoveriegnOne at 11:58 AM
2 Comments:
Mother fucker... don't mention the fact that you doubled up off the guy who lent you the money to get back into the game... and that you did it on a three-outer-out-kicked-can't-fold-top-pair-because-it's-a-pair-suck-out.
The only thing I mentioned is that you spotted me 100 dumbass, not once did I say I doubled off of you, getting to the point where I cant even tell a story without breaking some poker etiquette, what gives?
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